She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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