I have demons in me.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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