Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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