Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I need a burrito and a hug.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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