Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
