I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
