O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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