Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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