I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
