Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize