Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
