I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
