Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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