is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize