the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Randomize
