keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
