Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Randomize
