You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
