I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
