I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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