just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
