I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
It's just like the Real World with babies
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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