You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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