so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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