It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize