I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
we're so committed to being not committed
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
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