I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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