No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize
