i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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