Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
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