Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
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