sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
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