im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
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