Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Randomize