Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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