so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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