last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize