Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
