no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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