My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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