i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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