You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
