She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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