i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
