he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm bleeding and have questions
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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