Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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