member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Why did my mother make you get naked?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize