the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
he fucked my hip out of place.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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