is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
