I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
