Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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