you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
